Hope For Molly

Sugar...Spice and ALL things Nice...That's my girl...my youngest "daughter"...my honer bunner...pumpkin head...silly willy...sugar booger...moller poller...Molly Girl...Molly Smith.

Sunday afternoon Maddy is reading a book quietly in her bedroom. Emily and I are sitting at the kitchen table filling out her scholarship paperwork for High School...as Molly, our black lab mix, is laying at our feet on the cool kitchen floor...When Maddy bursts in..."Mom, I'm going to the library...I just finished my book!" Not realizing when Maddy headed out the door...Molly followed. Moments later I hear the loud agonizing screams of a dog! I rush out the back door and do a quick scan of both gate doors..which are closed...a sigh of relief passes over me...when I yell to Emily to check on Molly in the house... Emily runs out..."Mom shes not in there!" I run to the front yard...and a car stops and asks me if I have a black dog..."it just got hit by a car!" My heart sinks....I may of had a panic attack...I'm not quite sure...

I arrive at the "scene of the accident" Molly still screaming...and I sit with her...and she calms down...until I touch her right leg. She's hurt bad...Everyone crowded around...I do not know anyone......I keep saying I'm so sorry...we've only been in our new home a few weeks...and she just isn't aware of her boundaries....I have know idea how she go out...probably jumped the small worn out fence. The neighbors say she was chasing a cat...Emily rushed to the house to grab a blanket we used as a stretcher...I almost asked Emily (my 13 year old) to run to the house and bring the car over...I ran over to the house and got it so we would not have to carry her as far...the neighbors helped me put her in the back of my car...The out pouring of compassion and support from our new neighbors truly touched my heart.

I took Molly to a 24 hr Vet Hospital......The whole way..I'm thinking she was clearly in bad shape...cuts, scrapes, her leg is hurt and possibly internal injuries..."Please Lord, don't let her die in the car" Emily is in the third row sitting with Molly...petting and comforting her...Maddy...(who somehow appeared at the scene) is in the second row reading her new library book.
The animal hospital techs were there to greet me and help me get Molly out of the car..we wait and wait...I think at this point Maddy has sampled everything in the vending machine.

We are finally placed in a room when the Dr. comes in. Molly has a..."closed right femoral fracture...." Her right leg is broken....and her treatment options are given to us...fix bone or amputate leg... We are heartbroken...it would not heal on its own...and both procedures are very costly. A few years ago my company offered pet insurance as part of my benifits package...many in family thought I was nuts for purchasing it...Thanks goodness I did. www.petinsurance.com
Now I must decide what to do...and boy was it ever so hard...Molly is a part of our family...we are animal lovers...always have been...always will be... Why do I feel it necessary to make excuses as to why I chose to save Molly's life?

I chose surgery to repair Molly's leg. She's a young healthy dog...the doctor said it was the BEST way to go for Molly to return to normal function....
Molly's home now...she's in quite a bit of pain..and it's going to be a long road to recovery...and at this very moment I'm not sure I did the right thing for our Molly Girl...

Before

After

Birth Order Of Children

Some funny...some..true......however, I still obsess way to much...


1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
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Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
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The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
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Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
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0A Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
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Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to
complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
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Activities:
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
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Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to
leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
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At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from
the children
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Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully
watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

A few recent pics of my brother Jon's little munchkins..
Thanks to my sister-in-law Michelle who recently emailed these to me!!!

"Jeremy Ray"...My handsome nephew is so tough!! He's just like my brother! (who's in the background in the sunglasses)



My little niece "Jenna Nicole"....isn't she soo pretty!!!

I've been Tagged...

I've been tagged!!!

Now I have to find 7 interesting things about myself...I'm not a fan of this sort of thing...or maybe I'm just to self-guarded...and find it difficult to let people in...(probably why I've yet to remarry)...But my dearest, oldest friend Christy has tagged me and I'd do anything in the world she ask me to...Yes...even jump off a roof...as long as she was holding my hand!!!(which we've done)

1. My Dad still lives in the house where I was born and raised...and he still has the same phone number!
2. I was in the movie "A League of Their Own"
3. I can drive a stick shift...and a 24' box truck...as long as I don't have to park or back up!
4. I'm an avid multi-tasker...on a typical night I talk on the phone, check email, check homework, text,watch CNN and cook dinner all at the same time....I'm not kidding...
5. I can plan and host a dinner party...Martha Stewart style...very cheap...
6. I use to be a gymnast...okay...well...love gymnastics...fanatically....took two classes a week and swore I was going to be the next Mary Lou Retton!
7. I have a degree in Organizational Leadership and I'm the biggest pack rat you'll ever meet! Come on over and I'll show you one of my prom dresses!!!

There they are...it's only taken me about an hour to write those...b/c I'm at work answering questions, taking phone calls...text and working on my reports.....oh and eating lunch...too...

Up for some air...

The house is empty!!! The moving company delivered all the major stuff Saturday...and whats left is in the POD...I never thought I'd see the day when the rooms would actually be empty...All the packing and trashing...and yard sales...and it's finally empty...Everyone said I'd feel this sense of relief when it was all done...well I'm not there yet....but I'm anticipating that for sure....Since I've closed on my new house, here in Indiana.....I've been offered positions in Norfolk Virginia and Greensboro NC...can you believe it? What am I going to do? I need some help on this one....really.....

Pro's

Career Advancement

More money

New start

Catholic High School Nearby(that I'd be able to afford)

Small community

Emily starts High School next fall

Maddy starts middle school next fall

Closer to Uncle Jon

Closer to Dad

Relocation on the company dime

Only 6hour drive to Kentucky

Con's

Ex alleges will take me back to court if I move

Moving a teenager

New School

New Friends

More work hours

Less time at home

Moving

New Church

6 hour drive to Kentucky!

Is it obvious? Is the answer staring me in the face? I seriously doubt the Ex would sue for custody...but I'm not a person to take chances...especially when it comes to my girls.

Maybe I feel a bit robbed. Robbed of my independence. Being divorced from this man and still feeling as though I have no say in my future.....My mom asked me, "what does you gut say, Nic?"

Well first reaction was oh wow, definitely..I'm there perfect timing...blah blah....then reality set in.....and my practical way of thinking has overtaking me as usual...

Lets see...Maddy graduates high school in 7 years or so...and I'll barley be 40...so I'm going to wait...surely the opportunity will present it self again, right?

Blogging Up And Running (...i think....)

I've been having a bit of trouble viewing my blog...I'm not sure what I did or did not do...but It appears okay now... I guess we will see...
I had to delete and modify quite a bit...I may take a break...b/c my goodness...what happened?

Happy Birthday Christy!!!

Hope you had a great day!!!

Love ya!

Emmy Kate...

Just when you think you know everything about your children....your blindsided......

My Emily can do anything!!! She can sing!! Yes that's right! She has the most beautiful voice I have ever heard! She told me several days ago that she was going to cantor this year at the school masses....Which she has done quite often over the years in school...but not at her new middle school...and not a SOLO!! She failed to tell me that she was singing a solo...and she conveniently waited to tell me the night before the Mass...so I surely couldn't take the morning off work...pretty sneaky, huh? So, whats a Mother to do? I make her practice right there in the family room (in our normal presentation practice spot)...in front of the fireplace...as she begins to sing...I realize my jaw is hanging to the floor!! "when did this happen?" "how did I miss this?"
How could I be so blind? Am I really this busy...that I could miss such a talent? Wow...I was blown away!

She called me after school to tell me the usual stuff...I'm fine...were on our way to the soccer game...see ya there...love ya bye. As I'm sitting in my office...with my cell phone clutched in the palm of my hand..."that's it?" Em never mentions her solo...so I wait a couple minutes and call her to confirm the time of the game and casually ask how she did on her solo...(pretty sneaky, huh?)..and I hear a small chuckle...fine Mom...and I quickly say...okay we will talk about it tonight...I wasn't thinking she was in a van filled with her soccer team...okay uncool Mom error..I get it!!omg...

Not only does she blow it out of the stain glass church windows...she ROCKS!! After Mass a few of the older parishioner's (who attend the school masses on Thursdays) ask the music teacher "Who is that girl?" "Where have you been hiding her?" We attend Mass at St. Ambrose and Emily goes to school at St. Mary's......she's been a cantor at St. Ambrose hundreds of times over the years...but never a solo....I'm so proud of her!! Who would of thunk it??

....seems like yesterday...~Emmy Kate~

To postpone...or not...

Tomorrow's Friday....thank goodness...another work week coming to and end....as I try to sum up my week in my mind....all that I've accomplished...and did not.....I begin to reassure myself that I will be sure to do those unaccomplished things...this weekend...however...as I put it all in my mind....it all seems to disappear by mid-day Saturday....and by Sunday evening...I'm in my famous "mad woman" rush to pull it all together...why is that? Why do I procrastinate? I never use to be that person...have I taken on more than I can handle? Or maybe I've always been that person...and now my tasks are just greater...so I and surely everyone else around me is noticing....perhaps waiting for me to cave.....
Definition---Procrastination: postpone doing something: to postpone doing something, especially as a regular practice
...or
Late 16th century. "put off until tomorrow"

or
“Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of the success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the “someday I’ll” philosophy.” - Denis Waitley

I like the 16th century definition much better...don't you? Not as harsh

Tetanus Shot and Post Injury Photo...

Can you see the hole in my eyebrow? Looks more like a mole...bug...or at least that's what Maddy tells me...

Does everyone really get a tetanus shot every 10 years? When was your last tetanus shot? I had one today...and ouch...I really don't remember ever having one before today.......Maddy cried for me...and kept asking me over and over if she would really have to get one of those...(she doesn't remember her booster shots) she then asked if there was a medicine she could drink instead...The Doc also gave me an antibiotic...b/c my puncture was so deep and the risk for infection was high......

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On a sad note....The nurse who gave me the shot...told me....when she was a teenager...her horse stepped on a rusty can of some sort...and then she herself scraped her hand on it...and well she had to get a tetanus shot...and she was fine...but her horse died of tetanus!! It was so sad...she said there are not tetanus shots for horses!!?? She said it was a long painful death...very sad..and she had tears in her eyes... It was a most touching moment...

I thought of St. Francis of Assisi and all his pet blessings and his love for all God's creatures......"We are all creatures of one family. We are all brothers and sisters."—St. Francis of Assisi

Why Me?

Basketball, football and even soccer games...

The ball flew out of control into the stands...and always hits someone...okay...well...

that someone is me...EVERY TIME!!

Okay...I debated sharing this story...but here I go..

Sunday morning...I'm up at 730am...not sure why...we were going to the Youth Mass in the evening....but anyway....I was up...and Emily's cat (Patches) was meowing non-stop as I'm trying to check my email...... I decide to go ahead and feed her...You see it's Emily job....but I thought...hey...I'll give her a break today...and as a bonus for me...the cat will leave me alone......her food in located in our pantry...(so Molly wont eat it)..... and just as I bent over to pour her food.... I feel a strong force.... a POKE... and I immediately grab my eye...thinking...I'm okay...until I remove my hand and it's covered in blood!!!(sorry if you have a weak stomach)...So...I'm starting to panic...and I look down and see the fork on the floor...No...I don't try to stop the bleeding....what do I do? I run to the mirror to check out the damage...I'm okay...it's just a deep puncture wound smack in the middle of my eyebrow!!! I call my sister frantic...she's half asleep (Nurse/night shift) I swear she hangs up on me...and I run over to Mom's....Mom checks me...and says I'm fine and to ice it..and take some Tylenol...in the mean time my sis is on her way to my house...and we pass each other... she's looking at me like OMG Nicole...your so stupid... as were pulled along side of one another.......she says ohhh..I see it...put ointment on it...and get a Tetanus shot.....later I ask my mom if she thinks I need a tetanus shot...she says."...well there good for 10 years...when was the last time you had one Nicole?" I respond..."Well, Mom, when was the last time you took me to have one?" So needless to say...I'm getting a Tetanus shot tomorrow at 530pm at my Dr. Office......I called his office today...what this poor Doc must think of me and our cat.....he treated me a few years ago...after Patches ran out of the house and I ran after her...not looking where I was running and flipped over a shrub (airborne) and dislocated my shoulder!!...

...okay..enough...I could go on and on...about all my trips and falls....luckily none were caught on camera....

Emily....Maddy...Molly....Patches...

A PIECE OF CAKE

For my Emily and Madeline....

Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Well, here is an explanation that makes sense.

A daughter is telling her mother how everything is going wrong. She's failing Algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her, and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her mother is baking a cake. She asks her daughter if she would like a snack. The daughter says, "Absolutely, Mom! I love your cake!" "Here, have some cooking oil," her mother offers. "Yuck!" says the daughter. "How about a couple of raw eggs?" the mother asks. "That's gross, Mom!" the daughter replies. "Well, would you like some flour then? Or maybe some baking soda?" questioned the mother. "Mom, those are all yucky!" answers the daughter. To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake! God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good. We just have to trust Him and eventually, they will all make something wonderful." God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring, and sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He is ready to listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

author unknown

Sleeping....

I never sleep...well...5hours on a good night...I try to actually go to bed by 1230...but the sleeping thing...is another thing...tossing and turning...millions of things running through my mind.....anything from getting the girls off to school to what deadlines or reports are due the next day...I found that the more I sleep...the more tired I am...weird..i know...Although now that I'm the age that I am...I can't recall the last time I actually stayed up until dawn...so...i'm okay...I do take the occasional 20min power nap...or "shut eye" as my dad calls it...and when the girls are at daddy's...I do have my sleep all day Saturday...so...I do make up for the loss of shut eye...

This morning...I had to go to the terminal from 10-12 for our FY08 award ceremony....and breakfast...it was nice...I won two awards...MVP (most valuable person) in my department...and the Purple Promise Award.....it was so nice to be recognized...definitely made my day...and will keep me inspired throughout FY09...

Well...got to run for now...going to drop Em off at soccer practice...then off to the bread store for rolls....I'm co-hosting the dinner for Sunday nights youth group meeting at church.....

At last Friday....

Taking a quick lunch break today...went to McDonald's..for two snack wraps...and orders for 5 others at work...oh well...do unto others...did I mention it was raining?...

Girls talked to Daddy last night about going down this weekend....but when I called Clay today to confirm the time and stuff.......he said that next weekend is Mason's 2nd birthday party and tomorrow he was going to football game...and would much rather have them next weekend instead...well he actually said he would like to have them both this weekend and next...but that would mean Emily missed two soccer practices...not to mention me having two terrible Monday mornings... of overtired cranky girls...and then gas prices...so...next weekend is set......it seems that there is always a birthday party and their daddy's house...well I guess when you have 6 kids...there is sure to be a bd every other month.....Yes...Emmy and Maddy's dad has four kids with his 2nd wife...3boys under the age of 6 and one girl...a couple months old......it could be worse...it could be me with 6 kids...and married to him....just kidding...not a very Christian thing to say...but...more about that later...
Well...back to work...maybe I'll write more later...

Yearning for Saturday Morning...

What a week...Monday.....up at 5am...dropped girls off at 7am..okay 730am but I was shooting for 7am.....then to work...until 530...then off to the 6pm Girl Scout Service Unit meeting..didn't make it until 630....the church we hold our meetings in...is not air conditioned...and the meeting was on the third floor!!...well maybe they just didn't have it on...but the meeting is once a month for the adult leaders...planning and such.....usually lasts about an hour..pending..questions.....but of course we had optional Fall Products training right after the meeting adjourned...and all I could think about was..."optional"...I'm not staying...after all I haven't seen my girls since I dropped them off for school...and it was already nearly 730pm...and the training could last up to an hour...and then another 20 trying to leave...then 15-20min.. drive home...Nope...I need to be at home...sorry got to go...okay.....why do I feel guilty? Have to work on that..one....

Tuesday...Maddy woke up sick...Emily's upset b/c now we have to make a pit stop to Nana's to drop her off...and she "cant" be late for school...so I took Em to school first and back tracked to Nana's to drop Mad off.....Emily had Soccer practice that night until 8pm...and Maddy was at Nana's.....so I though finally...I can catch up on some work...so I stayed at the office until 630...and heading for the soccer field...but I had some extra time...and had been carrying the $80 bag of returns for weeks...the two pairs of school shorts Emily had to have from AE and Aero.....(the ones that were a perfect fit in the store while she was shopping w/Aunt Mary and my Visa...but somehow didn't fit or look the same at home...)Oh and I had some stuff to return to jcpenny for Mom...that I'd been carrying around even longer...so I made the pit stop..with my returns... which didn't see to be as quick as I anticipated......just as I'm heading for the soccer field...my cell phone rings..."..Mom, where are you?...practice is over.." It cant be it's only 751pm I'm thinking to myself..!! "we finished early" So...now my extra time turns into the "mad woman" rush...for fear of my daughter being the last one...b/c boy do i remember that feeling.....as I'm pulling into the field...my clock says...759...I'm late but not "late"...another mom and the coach stayed w/Em which was nice...but that meant and extra 25minutes of chatting...which was nice...but tonight after going through Maddy's papers....I'm thinking.... ....that's the extra 25minutes I'm not helping Maddy with her spelling test she FAILED this week...My super speller failed a test b/c we didn't practice....Wednesday.....Maddy has made a miraculous recovery and returns to school...Wednesday night is Maddy's Girl Scout meeting...only 5 girls show up...meeting from 6-7pm...left meeting at 655 and headed for the 7pm Class Trip planning meeting at Emily school.....only four parents and the teacher show up from her class...left meeting at at 815pm...Maddy was with me...and was ready to leave 5mins into the meeting... poor girl...she's had a very long day...it was when I finally got home...at nearly 9pm....All I could think of was my pillow...when my sister calls...Nicole I need you to come over right away....So...as I'm driving over to this family crisis.....and dwelling on all that I've done in this short week...I could cry...when I begin to pray...a verse comes to mind...Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest....I keep thinking it over and over...so much that when I come home...I have to look up the verse...I knew it was Matthew something......and is was...Matthew 11:28....okay...now I can sleep.....